Sunday, July 22, 2012

Could have done without that...

I am one of those people who can watch a movie a few times and if I like, be able to recite the whole move... So, if you can tell me what movie this blog title came from you get a gold star. lol It is one of my all time favorite movies ever! Unfortunately, the star of the movie died of a drug overdose... Ok that is the only clue I am giving :)

No really, this past week I had a few experiences that I could have done without. See this past week was our first week back in our classrooms to start getting ready for the new school year that starts in T-minus 15 days... 15 DAYS!!!! See this wouldn't be that big of a deal except I am moving down to 1st grade (THANK YOU LORD & PRINCIPAL T). See I have to start from scratch, because I gave all of my 1st grade stuff away after my first year in 4th. Now 5 years later I am starting ova. Its alright though because I am a little person teacher at heart anyway. So Monday, I got in there and couldn't see the forest for the trees. So I had HUGE plans for Tuesday, I was going to be there all day. Side Bar: I should never "plan" anything with the house on the market... its like realtors have bugged my house and call to show whenever I have said out loud, "I have plans." 

So, Tuesday morning at 8:20 I get a text message, to show my house for 2 freaking hours... WHAT? I respectfully told them they could pick one hour. So, 10:30 - 11:30 it was, it gave me time to get up and get the house spic and span... At 11:28 they call to say she needs more time. I have been sitting in my car with it running for an hour with 2 crazy dogs and she wants more time?!?!?! I said ok. At 11:50, i mins after she said she would be there I call back. She is 10 mins away. Here I climb on my soap box. If your job is to show houses, and you know that the seller is sitting in the car in the 100+ degree temps SHOW UP ON TIME or don't make the appointment. You need time management training anyway. NO ONE sets up showing times for 2 hours. So they finally showed up and I get back in my house with my hot dogs (yes they have fur coats ya know) at 12:15. I am so mad I could spit nails so no classroom work Tuesday. We get another showing that night... more about that in a minute.

Well, Wednesday am I get up early and make my way to my 3rd check in with my dr. for the insurance co. for my surgery. My blood pressure seems to be higher when I go in the am, because everyone and their brother goes to the dr. and I end up parking 5 miles from the building and have to truck it to make the appointment time. So, I got there early, only about a half mile (not really but for a fat girl it still is a ways to walk... good exercise but, not good for bp. ) The nurse takes my blood pressure and says, whoa.. that is really high (189/110). I immediately FREAK OUT! She says here sit here and find your happy place and I will come back and take it again.... Um all I could think about was I must be dying!!! my bp is usually 120/80 at the highest. It is 166/110 this time, I start crying... why is this happening to me. I am a crier too, once I start I can't stop. Dr. K comes in and says what is wrong... you are probably just having anxiety or something. But, does and EKG just to make sure. My heart is fine, my head not so much. See apparently (I am learning so much about health and health issues these days) high bp can cause very bad headaches... But headaches can also cause your bp to go up. So in the words of Dr. K which came first... we don't know yet. He doesn't put me on meds, but tells me to take it easy and take my bp once a week for the next 4 weeks til I see him in Aug.

I am headed on my way with a headache, the fear of high bp and its side effects, and I get a feed back email from the night times showing stating my house's price is too high for the size, and needs to be cleaned..... It really is amazing I didn't kill over right there in the elevator! By the time I get home I am feeling really weird and my head feels like it might explode. I try to rest and sleep... not happening. So I call my mom, talk to her and she informs me that with bp like that I could have a stroke.... WHAT?!?!?

I am pretty sure that Wednesday was the biggest eye opener ever! It is so important to pay attention to your body and your health. It wasn't until about midnight that I finally started feeling normal again. I am looking into putting the cake biz on hold for a while, and trying to not get so upset about things... I don't ever want to feel like that again. I am looking at all the balls I am juggling and seeing what I really need to keep and what I can let go of. It will be hard for me not to freak out or obsess over things, but I am going to try not to for my health's sake. Moral to this story: Take care of yourself! All that other stuff won't matter if you aren't around to see it or participate in it.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

The card attached would say...

Ok I know I am a dork... that has been obvious for years. I have a weird and quirky sense of humor. I have always loved Golden Girls! I mean they were funny when I was a kid, they are even funnier now. I find myself laughing so hard I cry sometimes. I guess you could say their humor is like mine. I once took one of those silly quizzes on FB about which Golden Girl would you be... I wasn't sure who I would be but the fact that I got Rose made me die laughing. Am I really that character? Which Golden Girl would you be?Anyway, when I watch the reruns over and over they are still funny to me. What happened to that kind of good tv?

Tonight I got together with my sorority sisters that get together at least once a month. I know I have previously posted about these girls. I love them so, it is sometimes hard to hear of all the blessings and miracles in their lives when I am bombarded with the unanswered prayers over here ( insert pitty party... I think I am about done with those though!). In fact, many times I don't make it to these get togethers because I tell myself I won't have anything to contribute. Most have children, a few are singles, then there is me the infertile. How crazy is it that when infertility is introduced in your life it starts defining you? Well, I am glad I went tonight. I don't know why I let my little infertile devil on my shoulder talk me out of making time to go each month. These ladies are truly the best thing since sliced bread. I can be me infertile or not, over weight or not, crazy or not and guess what THEY LOVE ME for me! I have got to remember this when my little voice says nah you are too busy,  or too tired,  or even just not sure you can handle the kid talk etc. Anyway these girls have been in my life since college. I watched them all join my chapter DG (I am the oldest pledge class represented) I actually pref'd a few of them, one is my lil sis, we really are like real sisters, we all watch out for each other. Don't mess with my sister lol. We are there for happy times,  we are there for the sad times, we even send group texts that drive me crazy lol. I have a few true friends that are not in this group of girls, but when anything happens in my life aside from family these girls are the ones I want to tell first.  

I am so truly blessed with a wonderful life, wonder friends, and so many more exciting miracles to come. So, if you threw a party and invited everyone you knew... would the card attached say Thank you for being a friend? I am so thankful for these girls and I hope they all know that the biggest gift would be from me! I just wanted to put it in writing! :)

Here are some funny scenes from my favorite old show :)

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Completely Overjoyed & Excited!!!

I am going to start this post with my complete overjoy for C and her husband the birth of their son Anthony!!! I first started reading her blog a little over a year ago. I could identify with her feelings and was going through the same phases of this journey as she was... Although she was further along but, that was helpful too. She posted about a novena and it intrigued me. Because of sweet C I joined her in prayer and focused my prayer and actually set aside time to do so. I think really that it not only helped my spiritual journey, it really helped me give it all to God, and focus on thanking him for all I have and to pray for others in a much more focused way.

 So, when fast forward to last Friday... She posted about "the call." They were picked by a birth mother in California. So Saturday they were able to fly to get that precious little miracle! This makes my smile just typing it. I am so overjoyed for her little family.

Now for the excited part... I had my first appointment with my bariatric surgeon today. I know in the past I have posted about this... I can't remember (getting old... my mom asked me today if I was really going to be 33 in a few weeks lol I AM!!!) But, I am going to take charge of my life and do this surgery. After ho humming it for a year and being generally disgusted with what I am become, I made the first move back in May. I am on my third  monthly weigh in, and have only 3 more to go. It looks like my surgery will be about the first or second week in Dec.

I love my surgeon. She is very personable and is highly recommended. She told me today (what my internal med dr. has already told me) that I am perfect candidate for the surgery. I will be doing the gastric sleeve. This is where they actually remove about 85% of my stomach completely. The other type,  gastric bypass actually leaves it in there... I can't do that. I know am weird I know. Anyway, the even more AWESOME news that she told me today was... It almost 100% CURES PCOS. That is the best news of all!!! She did say that with in 3 months you could get pregnant, but they don't recommend it for a year or your weight plateaus. I had already decided that we would not try until after that year, I would be 34 and that is still pretty young right? Not to mention, I don't want to not lose as much as I could because I get pregnant in the early stages of weight loss... wouldn't that be defeating the purpose? I mean I can't be as healthy as I can be for my child, if I don't do the work to get that way. This surgery is only a tool to help, its not going to work by itself. I am just so ready to make this change and get on with my life... and maybe even find the real/ old me that is hiding inside this larger than life body.