Wednesday, December 29, 2010

What a Merry Christmas!!!

Well this Christmas could have been a terrible time if I had let it. I prayed that God would allow me a pass though. I really didn't want to be sad or upset and let it ruin everyone's holiday who came in contact with me. It was tough for about 3 days. It always seems that when you are at your lowest that is when you see whatever that is troubling you everywhere. This time was like most. Everywhere I looked I saw VERY pregnant women or families with lots of little ones. I was alright until a kiddo would make eye contact with me or wave. I prayed very hard that as the saying says, this to shall pass. And it got easier, I can even talk about it now and not cry.

So by the 23rd I was doing better and finishing up Christmas Presents. Man did I pull one on Robbie this year. He really thought that all he was getting was underwear and a pair of boat shoes that I actually had given him the day we had our pictures made for the Christmas cards. But, I wrapped up a sheet that I typed up saying that he would have to look for his last present. I told him it would fit in closets, under the bed, or in corners out of the way. He didn't want to look for it he really wanted me to just give it to him, but he looked for it anyway. I had wrapped it and put it under the couch earlier in the week. He was totally surprised that I got him a muzzle loader. That is a gun for none hunting folks. He had one and sold it right at the beginning of the muzzle loading season. He had immediate sellers remorse. So I thought that would be a great Christmas gift. I even told him we shouldn't spend the money on it right now... Hee hee I am sneaky sneaky. I tried to find a picture of it, but couldn't find one.

Zeke had a fabulous Christmas. He got so many toys he didn't know what to play with. And since he has ripped all the stuffing out of his Christmas goose and one of his skinny dogs.

Robbie got me some clothes ( I actually ordered them online for him to give me lol), Pure by DKNY perfume, and a mani/pedi at New You Salon & Spa.

We both got money and gift cards from my parents and "Santa". He hasn't used his yet, but I used mine Monday. I got an awesome Shark Vac then Steam mop.Two words for this creation: TRULY AMAZING!!! It is crazy
how much my sweet pup sheds and this sweet machine sucks it all up. I didn't even have to sweep. Then the steam part of it sanitizes and cleans the floor. Wow, am I easily amused or what??? Really if you have any type of hard floor surfaces you need this for sure!

On another note, we have decided to pay off some debt and start working on this old house to hopefully put it on the market at the end of the summer. This is very ambitious, but since the baby front isn't looking promising, we really want to move. So we have something to focus on while we put the baby making on the back burner.

All in all this Christmas was not what we had hoped for, but it sure was a wonderful holiday considering! 2011 is going to be a great year for us! We know it!!!

Monday, December 20, 2010

Amazing Night

Well this past Friday we headed out of town to Nashville for the Garth Brooks concert. It was a quick trip, but so worth it!!! We stayed at the Double Tree, which was nice. We met up with friends Laurie and Craig and headed out to the Concert.

Laurie and Craig got the tickets online from a ticket broker. Little did we know we paid more than face value for them. We got through the door and the lady scanning our tickets said there was something wrong with them. She asked us if we had already entered the building. Well obviously we didn't. So they took us to the ticket counter where we were told the tickets had been voided and or already used. They took them and said sorry about your luck. We were all freaking out. Craig called the broker and told him what was going on, and Robbie asked the lady if there were any tickets. Of course she said no its sold out. Then a few minutes later when we were not moving from her little ticket window she said, "oh here are 4 on the lower level. Do you want to purchase them?" We got four 3rd row tickets for $110, we originally spent $330 for the 4 from the broker. We were super excited!

The broker refunded the money and offered us tickets to another show. All in all we totally hit the jack pot! The stars were aligned :)

The concert was truly amazing! Garth is such a performer!!! Here are some pictures from the blessed event! :)

Well with everything going on lately it was super fabulous to get away and enjoy ourselves. Ever since all the shots, clomid, and IUI I have been an emotional roller coaster, so needless to say some of the songs struck an emotional cord with me. We were so close to the sound booth and back stage area that I had Robbie take a picture of the play list sitting on a speaker box. It was definitely a sign when I saw the song circled on the list.
I am so blessed that all my prayers haven't been answered over the years. Man, who knows where I would be if all the prayers I had at various times through out high school and college had be answered. Unfortunately, I have one prayer that is currently unanswered and the song makes me think, maybe I should be thanking God instead of questioning why????

I am so thankful for that wonderful night. Saturday was not lacked the happiness. I had shared with a friend earlier in the week that we would know if the IUI worked this weekend. I also asked her to pray that if we weren't pregnant for my cycle to hold off until we get back because I knew it would take the wind out of my sails. Not even an hour after we got home, I went to the bathroom and got our answer. I felt like a ton of bricks had just been dropped on my chest. The disappointment is indescribable. I needed some time to cry and be sad. I have tried to keep a happy face in public, but in private I am devastated. Robbie was sad too. He said, " I really thought you were pregnant, that it was going to work." That broke my heart even more. I think this time more than ever there was more invested in this. But, unlike the other cycles, I really gave it all to Him. I knew there weren't that great of chances, but that there was a better chance than on our own. I prayed during the insemination that his will would be done, that I really wanted this, but knew and trusted his judgement. I had a peace about it. I felt like we really had a chance.

So, we start yet another cycle, a year and a half into this crazy adventure. We have decided to stop trying for the time being. We will regroup and adjust and move on. We will continue to put our faith in God and know that even though we don't see the tiny miracle we hope for that we will be parents one day.

Monday, December 13, 2010

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas... Cards with Shutterfly!

There is a chill in the air, snow flurries this past Sunday, the tree is all decorated, stockings hung, present bought and almost all wrapped.... what could I be missing?????

CHRISTMAS CARDS!!!! We got our pictures taken a few weeks ago, and I am chomping at the bit to get them back so I can get our Christmas cards made, addressed, and mailed all in 12 days. Nothing like waiting to the last minute huh?

Well, Shutterfly makes it so easy I am not too worried about the short amount of time I have to get them done. I heard from a couple of friends that Shutterfly had great Christmas cards this year. So, I have checked it out and man there are so many to choose from I am having a really hard time. They have traditional, modern, contemporary, whimsical, you name it they have it.

Here are the 3 I have narrowed it down to for this year:

When it comes to addressing all these Christmas Cards it can give you cramps, well Shutterfly has an alternative for you, not only can you have them mail them for you, you can purchase mailing address labels. They have such cute styles too!

But that is not all you can make on Shutterfly. I have used Shutterfly for photo books in the past. There is something about a personalized photo book that makes a gift so special! I made a book for my Dad for Father's Day. When we finally get pregnant I have a feeling I will be making lots and lots of photobooks! Check out all of the layouts and choice you have when you use Shutterfly:

I am looking forward to using Shutterfly to capture all our family's special moments in 2011!!!

Saturday, December 11, 2010

On the 11th day of Christmas...

Well we finally got all of the decorating done today. I love this time of year, but its a lot of work to get it ready and in order. So, I thought I would share our Christmas Cheer since we really don't have many visitors to see it in person.

This Christmas we have so much to be greatful for!
* We are so blessed to have each other! In the craziness of this year my loving and devoted husband has kept his cool, tried to make me feel like all was not lost every CD 1. I am so blessed and Thank GOD for him every day!

* I am not sick like last year. Man the holidays last year were terrible for me. I am so blessed to have had a wonderful ENT to take care of my sinus issues and a loving husband and Mom to take care of me post surgery.

* I have the sweetest doggie there is. In fact this year we was going to try out to be one of Santa's Reindogs.

* We are both so blessed to have our wonderful jobs. Now Robbie will disagree with the wonderful part, but he did get a raise this year and had been working more than last year. His boss made mention of thinking of him at Christmas... I sure hope it's not the Jelly of the Month Club. lol

* We have such wonderful family! We could not make it without them! We were able to Move Linda to Collierville this summer and that has been a Godsend! We just wish we could get her house in MS sold.

* We continued our Mayo Family tradition last night of decorating my parent's tree. It is always a fun event. And by fun I mean hilarious, Christmas Vacation type of fun. This is the Mayo Family Tree all 13 feet of it in all its glory.

I could go on forever and ever, but I am sure this post is long enough. This Christmas we are looking for a miracle, but knowing that there are miracles happening for us everyday. One last photo to share with you, our stockings are hung by the chimney with care and our Santa gnome is peeking from behind the tree.

Sunday, December 5, 2010

With God All Things Are Possible!

So, this has been a VERY expensive & eventful week and weekend. I had 2 ultrasounds, blood work twice, 5 shots, trigger shot on Friday, we inseminated on Saturday, and a very powerful message at Heartsong on Sunday.

So, we went in for the IUI on Saturday morning and it was kind of surreal sitting in the office waiting for Robbie's part. A lady came in with her 16 month old and husband to get blood drawn because she got a positive on Thursday. She was praising the doctor because this was her second miracle that he had helped her with. Of course she had a different problem than me, but it was interesting to hear her story and that she had the same fears I have even with a different issue. Robbie went to work and I went back an hour later for the main event. My only fear was the number of sperm there would be. I was super relieved and happy when I saw the number on the paper. It was more than it had been for the initial testing. 2.2 million more!!!! Aside from my cervix not wanted to be bothered, it was painless! No cramping, no nothing once my cervix decided to cooperate. I prayed during the entire procedure that God would help those little swimmers find the egg(s) this time and that the time was right. In 15 min I was on my way home. I had some cramping that night, but it went away after a while.

Today I woke up early and headed to church, its been a while since we have been. But, Robbie had to work, so I was on my own. I have to say in the past almost every message I found myself hearing exactly what God wanted me to hear, almost like the message was specifically for me. Well, I think that this message was just for me more than ever. I wanted to share it with you all. With Christmas only 20 days away the message series is titled, A Christmas Conspiracy: The Subversion Message of The Birth of Jesus, today's message was on God Comes First. Well, aside from the fact that he focused on the fact that God chose Mary to conceive Jesus, it was centered around the fact that with God all things are possible. An example to Mary was that Elizabeth was in her forties and had been able to conceive, which only made it more like a God was saying Hey Morgan... Pay attention :)

Now, I know this and I am sure if you believe in God then you do too. But, it was just what I needed to be reminded, since we have just done the iui.

At one point on the screen there was a picture of a baby's face and hand in utero. I was bawling. I am crying now thinking/ typing about it. I took away with me the feeling that God was trying to let me know that it will happen, to just keep believing and putting him first. So, I just wanted to share that with you all! I know that I get down traveling this journey, but I have to remember all things are possible with God!

I have a peaceful feeling about this. If I'm not in for a Christmas Miracle, then I know my miracle will come sometime in the future!

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Drum Roll Please...

Well today was my follow up ultrasound. Even though I was really hoping to have 3 or 4 mature follies, I had 2 one almost 15mm and another 16.8 mm. So, I am doing one more follistim shot tonight and then.....


IUI is set for Saturday morning. I am in shock that we made it to this point. I really don't know if I will be able to believe it until I am actually on the table and being inseminated. This is so surreal. I know this is exactly what we have been trying for all these months. But, I guess after the failed attempt at making it to the iui last cycle I just assumed or told myself that it wasn't really going to happen. I don't know if that makes sense to anyone but me, but its the way I feel.

I am so grateful for this road we are on. It really has made me such a stronger person, even through the hardships, disappointments, almost downright devastating times, I am so thankful God has chosen us to go through this. I know that there is some (very hard to comprehend) reason that this road has been difficult to get down. Now as we embark on the "more waiting" leg of this crazy trip we call Operation make a Baby Robbins, I will try to stay calm, collected, and sane. This is going to be the LONGEST 13 to 15 days!!!

All Prayers are welcome and appreciated :)