Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Who knew my life could be defined by 2 little lines...

I never would have thought that so much would fall on two lines. Back in early years of high school and college, those finding the two little lines were not always happy about it. In some ways, back then those two little lines could ruin your reputation, make you the talk of the town, or even make you even think you life was over. Everyone was scared of the thought of being pregnant before you were married and such.

Fast forward a few years, college was over, and I looking for my hunka, hunka, burning love. I thought, oh I want kiddos, but was not worried about it cause it would happen when I got married and was ready for all of that responsibility.

A few years later I found him. So,...
Husband.... Check
1st Anniversary.... Check
Let's get this ball rolling!!! HELLO I am married... Why is this not working???

Well who knew, after all those girls earlier in life and now make it look so easy, it isn't just a roll in the hay so to speak to get those two little lines.

I truly was over the two lines after seeing so many single lines... UNTIL THIS MOTHER'S DAY.

I guess I really hadn't thought too much about it other then when people make their announcements, but then all of the sudden its Mother's Day and I am NOT a mother... All of my close friends around me are in fact mothers... I don't even know if I can BE a mother. I mean I have no way of knowing other than FAITH that I will be pregnant one day. Now I didn't throw a pity party, in fact (in a very PROUD voice) I didn't even cry. But, a few sweet friends thought about this and me on Mother's Day with thinking of you texts and messages.

So right now, I will not let those lines define who I am, I am a mother to my sweet puppy and 23 little 4th graders who depend on my guidance as their mom while at school with me. One day in the future I will celebrate Mother's Day as a parent. For the time being, I will be fine!

On the weight loss front, I am nervous, our second weigh in is on Friday... I haven't been so great in the past week. I am just looking for loss, because this summer its going to be on, and I will have so much more time to devote to it.

1 comment:

  1. No tears is so hard sometimes. I don't think a lot of people realize the competition with yourself, daily thoughts, struggles, and overwhelming emotions of it all. You are a wonderful person and will make an incredible mommy one day! Maybe once your focus is changed on exercising, school is over, and you are more relaxed, it will happen. I am always thinking and praying for you! Love you