Finally getting somewhere... sortof

Well I was just talking to a friend today about infertility, rude people, and the craziness and changes that have occurred in our lives as we get older. She of course has 3 beautiful kiddos and such, but she really has had the same thoughts, and feelings I infertile party of one, have had over the past 2 years.

Now, she is new friend in the past couple of years, we don't talk all the time, but I met her through tutoring her son. I knew her husband in college. I am not really even sure how we got to talking about all the stuff we talked about today, but I got there around 1 and didn't leave until 4. We have a good talk about normal stuff, friends, drama, summer, our house being on the market.

(Side Bar: She had her house on the market, found one she loved, it went into foreclosure, so they lost it, and had already sold all their furniture... talk about disappointment!!! But, she has just recently taken the money they were going to put down on the new house and redone the kitchen and bathrooms, painted and really completely changed their current house completely.)

She now has my DREAM KITCHEN!!!

But, of course the infertility thing came up, it always does with people I don't talk to on a daily basis. But, this time I had the whole adoption option to talk about too. She said that her sister had to get on birth control pills to get pregnant. I know that it regulates, but completely defeats the purpose of getting pregnant at the time. But her sister does have a child now, maybe that should be an option... all except I have enough trouble remembering to take thyroid and PCOS meds. So I told her, " ya know I am really kind of over the whole having a baby thing." To that she said DON'T GIVE UP!!! I am not giving up, I am just over it. But I told her that the adoption thing was an option in my head but Rob - O was acting kind of weird about it. She agreed she could understand his reservations. He will not go for the idea of any ethnicity other than our own. yada yada yada.

Well, tonight to my total surprise, He started talking about it. He said he wasn't opposed to it, but that part that really got him was... This made me tear up. He always saw all our friends coming to the hospital to visit us like we do all our friends. Its things like that totally grab my heart and stomp on it with this whole stupid infertility roller coaster. He said he never really thought about the fact that maybe God wants us to have a baby through adoption.

I know that I am trying to wrap my head around something that is IMPOSSIBLE to understand, but, this is me grasping at straws.... Maybe God does want us to have a baby that "needs" us, not just a baby we "need." Unfortunately, Robbie has stupid softball on Tuesdays which is when the adoption meetings are each month, so this month is out... next month will be the 2nd day of school... so, maybe September is the month for us to go to the meeting.